He said he was never going to marry again — not that he was never going to commit to someone else or be in a relationship ever again.
I woke up yesterday morning to a news story about George Clooney possibly being single and once again his beliefs on marriage came under fire. George married Talia Balsam in 1989 and they were divorced in 1993. After their split, he said he would never marry again. This is always a hot topic with media and this belief can rub people the wrong way. But here is the thing: He said he was never going to marry again — not that he was never going to commit to someone else or be in a relationship ever again. Here is the other thing: He might also be happy the way he is. Should we be calling him a Forever Playboy or perhaps acknowledging that he is brave enough to work out what he wants in life and stand up for it publicly?
Society Pressures Us Into Marriage
We live in a society that puts so much emphasis on marriage as the ultimate happiness. But for some couples (some who have been together for quite some time), marriage can come with a lot of unwanted pressure that wreaks havoc on the relationship. If someone does not want to get married, it does not make them any less of a person. But some people view marriage as their ultimate happiness and cannot fathom how anyone else can be happy without it. They put pressure on everyone else around them to walk down the aisle and be “as happy as them.”
Forget The “Should Be’s”
I support George’s choice as he stands against social norms in deciding what it is he really needs to do with his life to be happy. If only the rest of us could ignore social pressures that force us into one universal mold, we could begin to question what everyone else thinks we should be doing.
One day I hope to meet the “should be” police. Who decided we “should be” doing anything? Yet we all at some stage in our lives abide by these “should be” rules. Who created these rules? What “should you be” doing with your life?
Be happy getting married or not getting married, as long as you are not doing it because you think you “should be.”
About the author: With a Bachelor in Psychology, a Postgraduate Diploma in Counselling and a Doctorate of Human Sexuality with San Francisco’s esteemed Institute for Advanced Study of Human Sexuality, Dr Nikki Goldstein is fast becoming Australia’s most in demand sexologist.