Swingers lifestyle choices

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Swingers Lifestyle Choices

There are many important choices you have to make in the swingers lifestyle. We thought it would be very useful for new couples to see what these important choices are. This is not a complete list, but we address the most important choices you will have together.
Lifestyle choices are personal and each couple will make different choices that feel comfortable. It is extremely important that you both make rules before playing in the swingers lifestyle. Usually if not all couples make changes in their choices, because they will feel more comfortable in the lifestyle. Don’t be afraid to make changes to your rules, but if you both feel comfortable and you both want to change a rule.

Do we place an ad or not?

We do not recommend placing advertisements on the Internet, magazines, phones, etc. This is not the safest or most successful method to meet active couples in the lifestyle. Most couples don’t advertise everywhere, they meet people in swingers-clubs/">swingers clubs, conventions, etc. And correspond to new playmates via internet, chat rooms, phone, private parties, etc.
If you decide to advertise or place an ad on the Internet or even on a forum, make sure you take many precautions to protect yourself. We have recommendations and safety guidelines that are very important to read on this forum.

What type of adult club is good for us?

Only you and your partner can answer this question, but it is very important that you select a club that will feel comfortable with both when you go there. Do your homework and read up on all the swingers lifestyle clubs in your area or within a few hours drive. There can be big differences between different clubs.
Each experienced swingers couple is different and each new couple entering the swingers lifestyle is different. Age, life experiences, sexual experiences, maturity, playfulness, willingness to experiment, sexual drive and much more are different for each person. Some young couples going to a clubs/">swingers club for their first time would fit perfectly into a dance club and a similar couple of the same age would be scared. The same goes for an older couple. A healthy attitude towards sex and openness to your sexuality are very important when choosing your first club. Everyone is nervous, so choose a club that suits you and you are willing to play in that environment.

What level of sexual play are we willing to go?

Both should choose a level of comfort in sexual play and discuss it with each other. You should agree on the level you have chosen. Some couples only want to go to an adult club and show their body parts. Others are only interested in erotic dancing and touching. Many couples are looking for a sexual playmate, but not sexual intercourse. Others are looking for the full meal deal, all including intercourse. Discuss it in detail and make a firm agreement. You can always agree on your levels of sexual play at a later time. Always go at the pace of the slowest partner!
Most new couples will only play with their own partner during their first visit to a swingersclub. This gives them a chance to feel more comfortable in the new environment and feel good about the other members attending the club. Most new couples need one or two visits to a club before they feel very comfortable experimenting with different partners. It is very important to take your time and make sure you feel comfortable and ready to experiment on different levels of sexual play. Some couples are ready to jump in immediately, but most couples need a period of development. Don’t let anyone tell you to join in.
People will ask you to dance or play, which is a very nice compliment on your first night out, but just be polite and play at your comfort level. Never feel like you disappoint someone by saying NO or not, thanks. Experienced couples will understand that you are new, but experienced couples will never know your comfort level if they don’t ask you. Lifestyles are very open people, so be honest and upfront.

Many couples choose a level of play, such as soft swinging (all sexual play WITHOUT intercourse). Many couples forget that personal choice can mean many different things.
All people are different in size, shape, color, religion, sexual drive to name a few. If you gave your partner permission to play sexually with another person, such as oral sex, would your partner have seen you three times if you turned your age away?
Variety is the spice of the swingers lifestyle. Don’t be shy to try someone taller, smaller, younger, older, bisexual or any other color. What is very important is that you allow both partners to choose a new playmate that is sexually attractive. If you specifically hate someone younger, older, taller, darker, say so before you play. Don’t limit your new partners to specific criteria to find a perfect date! You should remember that new partners are temporary, so enjoy the moment, you’re not looking for a lifelong partner, just a playmate to experiment with right now.

Do we lie or tell the truth to get what we want?

You might think that this is a stupid question, but some couples actually seem to like other couples to get what they want in the swingers lifestyle. We suggest you tell the truth! When you lie or deceive people, it doesn’t take too long before you are caught in a lie and other couples talk about your way of glorifying yourself.
Be honest and upfront with couples and let them know specifically what you are looking for in the lifestyle. Many couples want to try a BI feminine experience first and have normally found through text ads that it is very difficult to get into that reality. So many couples try to find a bisexual woman with little success and lie to other couples because they know they only want the female partner. With a little research on the lifestyle and swingers-clubs/">swingers clubs, these requests are very easy to fulfill. The swingers lifestyle is full of bisexual women but they normally come to a club with a male partner. Many couples play separately or in mixed numbers at swingers clubs so there are many opportunities to play with a bisexual lady without pairing with couples.

What level of protection will we adopt?

Some couples forget that sexually transmitted diseases can be transmitted through oral sex, kissing, towels, hands, whirlpools, sex toys and much more. Many couples don’t know that many diseases can be acquired simply by sharing a hot tub with another sexually active couple.
Diseases in the swingers community are rare, but there is always a risk so it is vital that you discuss where both of you are willing to draw the line. You can walk out your door tomorrow and be scooped by a car so it is important not to become paranoid. Many couples think that condoms are the only answer to safe sex but are surprised to find out that some condoms can cause illness. Many women are sensitive to different latex or lubricants and these irritations can lead to rashes that are considered part of the venereal disease family. 98% of all diseases are treatable, provided you want treatment for everything that is not out of place.
It is important that you practice COMMON SENSE! If something feels bad or bad, stay away from it. If a bubble bath is not clean or has foam on top, stay away. Use fresh towels to lie on and clean afterwards. Only use brand new toys with new partners. If you don’t use condoms, teach the couple or get a good indication from others and your intuition! Our bodies have a great ability to give us a sixth feeling or feeling about people. Trust your first impressions.

Do we use our real names or make up 1?

We advise you to use your real first names, unless your name makes you very visible and can lead to damage to your family. If you only give your first names without any other related information, you and the people around you will feel comfortable. We have several couples with the same names in our clubs.

If you tell couples that Bill & Hana live in a very remote community some couples who do not like you may travel to your small village or community and ask for Bill & Hanna, the whole village will probably bring them to your home. Each couple will need to determine if they have unique names or if you write out your names you could cause damage. Some couples who are extraordinarily well-known or have a sensitive occupation will rarely play in the same town or region where they live for fear of their clients, neighbours or colleagues who don’t understand their lifestyle, lose their job or can’t do business when it suits them.
99% of all swingers respect personal privacy in the lifestyle community. We know some couples who have different fake names, mainly because they have caused a lot of problems with other couples and gossip appears to stay away from Bill & Hanna, so they change the names over and over again. We estimate that 98-99% of all couples in the swingers lifestyle use their real first names when meeting new people.

What fantasies do you want to fill?

It is very important and fun to discuss your fantasies with each other. A big part of the swingers lifestyle is to add a little fun to your already good relationship. Seeing your partner is a fantasy fulfilled, it’s worth it to appreciate the tea in England! Too often we forget that life is really short. Enjoy the lifestyle and have a lot of fun with it.
Some people are not comfortable with dirty talk against their partner or wearing lingerie or having oral sex. Since these things can be the favorites of others, the swingers lifestyle gives you both the opportunity to enjoy your erotic favorite with new partners. Sharing these experiences with or next to your partner can be very stimulating and rewarding.

Do we have to play or divorce together?

We strongly recommend that new couples play in the same room with their new partners. Some couples are very comfortable to play in different rooms from day one, but half of the swinging experience also means that your partner will have a great time with a new sexual playmate. Playing together in the same room also offers the possibility to go in trios and quartet. If you both make progress in the swingers lifestyle, you might like to play in separate rooms later on and tell the story of your adventures afterwards.
A number of lifestyle couples will meet other couples they are close to and will actually exchange partners for a night, weekend, holiday, etc. You should feel very comfortable with your partner and new playmates before playing at this level.

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